POSTSCRIPT FROM LATER IN THE DAY: I survived the clinic without contracting Ebola (at least so far) and it is indeed bacterial conjunctivitis that I have in my eye. I am not able to go to work for 48 hours, which I can deal with, but I also have to put a gooey antibiotic ointment in my eye three times a day, about which I am not so sure. I can get eye drops and ointments into my eyes about as accurately as a blind elephant can skydive onto a dime. Plus the ointment in question is STICKY! Stickiness in any form is something I cannot abide, as you may recall from this blog post from last month.
Yes, it's true, I really do not suffer very well at all.